Monday, January 9, 2012

New year. New resolution.

Like most people, I'm terrible at sticking to my New Years Resolutions.
And like most people, my resolution is almost always to lose weight.
This year, my resolution is a little different, and a little bit the same as well.
My 2012 resolution is to become a better version of myself.
I'm tired of my inadequacies holding me back.

As I told you all a few months ago, I started a new job in October.
It's not quite what I was told, or dreamed it would be.
I'm not being challenged.
I'm not learning and therefore am not growing.
Life is about trial and error.
However, in this job there is no chance for error because there is no trial.
I want to learn from mistakes.
Grow in my position.
Feel accomplished and proud of what I create.
There's no place to succeed because no duties are handed to me.
It's just been a total let down.
I keep telling myself I'm going to stick it out.
It'll get better.
But when others holding the same title as I do asking me if I plan on staying because of how unstructured my position is and telling me they feel bad for me because of what I've been stuck with I start to second guess my decision to try and stick it out.
So because of this I've been glancing at what the career world has to offer me at this time.
You know....if something better happens to be out there within my reach.
However, I'm finding that without a college degree, there is little within my reach.
That, too, makes me feel a little down and out.
I want a bright future.
I want to earn that future.
In order to earn success I much work toward success.
So this year, I will be serious about furthering my education.
Enough talk.
More action.
In addition to a successful career in my future, I want to work towards becoming healthier.
Ideally becoming healthier also means losing weight, but that's not going to be what my goal is about this time.
I want to start incorporating exercise and a healthy diet into my daily lifestyle.
No more snacking.
No fast food/eating out at restaurants.
Occasionally I'll treat myself to a night out, but I refuse to let it be my daily diet anymore.
I'm a very picky eater and therefore lose a lot of the daily nutrition required, so I need to start taking daily vitamins to make up for that.
I'd really like to start going to church again, as well.
I don't consider myself to be "religious", and I'm not sure that's what I strive to be, but attending church makes me happy.
I don't know what I believe in.
At this time, God, heaven, and hell just isn't it.
But I enjoy learning about the possibility of that afterlife.
I do believe in many things that the bible teaches.
I think it's a great guideline to being a better person.
And that's what I get out of Church...
I need that back.
With my busy schedule it's tough to fit it in, which is why I stopped going in the first place.
But this year I'm going to make an effort again to fit it into my daily routine.

By this time next year I hope to be a better version of myself.

Wish me luck!

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